Thursday, March 16, 2006

Shelden Williams: The Ugliest College Basketball Player Ever?

The NCAA Tournament. A time when Cinderellas battle the cream of the crop. Where stars are born as dreams crumble. But who will come out on top?

What's that? UConn? Oh, dear reader, you misunderstand. We're talking about the NCAA Tournament for the ugliest player of all-time.

I've always been partial to Bill Walton, although, being from Boston, I can't count out Indiana State's Larry Bird (here looking like Rutger Hauer at his most rugged). However the last couple of years have seen a new contender rise: Shelden Williams of Duke.

Shelden has that certain something, that panache, that makes him stand out above the others. Maybe it's his intense determination on the court, or his nose for the ball, or maybe it's even his gigantic forehead that seems to jut out just a little bit too far. Who's to say really? But one thing that can't be questioned is that Shelden Williams is not a good looking man. To be perfectly honest, he looks like he could have challenged for the role of Pluto in the update of The Hills Have Eyes.

But I don't want to crown Shelden, or Walton, or any other famous ugly NCAA star without having a true contest for it. And that's why I'm asking for your help. In the comments section, give us some more of your picks for ugliest NCAA players of all-time. Then we'll stage our own Tournament and see who comes out on top! Because, as much as I'd love to give it to Shelden, the fact of the matter is, anything can happen in the NCAA Tournament!

17 Comments:

Blogger Howe said...

ya, that's pretty bad, but so is this photo of Patrick Ewing in college

11:24 PM  
Anonymous Chris said...

Great entry. I pondered this very question last March during the Tourney: http://journals.aol.com/cmottram04/SavedbytheBlog/entries/499

1:34 PM  
Anonymous Ranjeet said...

Yes, Shelden is very ugly, but I think that this contest ends with Lorenzo Mata of UCLA.

1:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trust me, I'm a UCLA grad and a Bruin die-hard, and Lorenzo Mata wins this one, hands down

1:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Geri McNamara?

2:09 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

This post made me laugh so loud, I woke up my nephew. Funny shit, guys.

2:23 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

2:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

josh boone of uconn

3:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. Mata looks like one of those combo faces Conan O'Brien makes. But a combo of what?!?

3:57 PM  
Blogger Mr Furious said...

How is it that the Mata photo still shocked me even though I knew it was going to be an ugly guy?

[shudder]

And if there was a sleeping nephew in this room, he would be awake also.

4:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a proud Dukie, I'd hate to see Sheldon lose this contest. Let me suggest what I tend to say everytime I see Sheldon on TV: "Doesn't he look exactly like the alien that busts out of the guy's stomach in Alien/Spaceballs? 'Hello my honey, hello my baby...'"

3:55 AM  
Blogger John T said...

I always though Shelden looked like Ken Griffey Jr. in the Simpsons episode when his head grew after drinking the brain tonic.

2:41 PM  
Blogger Howe said...

Griffey on brain tonic...hmm, i can see the similarity to Williams

4:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joakim Noah for Florida

4:48 PM  
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2:07 PM  
Blogger Luis said...

Yes, he is ugly as a kick in your nuts. SO, what the hell was Candace Parker thinking when she hooked up with that?
I think she wants to keep the human race from becoming the ugliest inhabitants of our planet, and decided to take one for the team and balance things a little.
Man, thanks to that the Blob Fish is still the ugliest thing on earth.
Thank you Candice!

10:28 AM  
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2:48 PM  

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